one day older. one day wiser.

Today marks the start of my 28th year of life. Every year I take out my imaginary "getting older" to-do list to check off boxes and write in new ones--yes I'm a OCD planner and I'm not one bit sorry about it! Having a birthday so close to New Year's Day is like killing two birds with one stone. I get a 2 week extension on "resolutions". ;)

On January 17th I ask myself if I'm getting somewhere, am I making progress.. overall, am I happy? The answer is yes to all of the above. In many ways I feel "ahead" of schedule, clear and heading in the right direction; but there are definite areas in my life that I'm confused about and feel as though they're going at a snail's pace--and that's ok! [sometimes]. I get that everything can't be perfect. Life wouldn't be exciting without some twists and turns, and unforeseen surprises (be them good or bad, or a mixture of both!)

I know I'm still young (right?), but with an end to my 20s [somewhat] in sight, I can't help but feel kind of old! I mean when I think about my worries today, they're pretty damn grown up. 

But, luckily I'm young enough to still dream big. Today is not a mark of another day gone by, but my youth. Taylor took a photo of me this morning and as I stare back at that me, I realize this photo does not mark an age, but a time. I have so much life ahead of me. In many ways it's only just beginning, or at least a start to a new chapter--I'll title it, "Ok so I'm a grown up, now what?". 

I have only a few things to add to my "getting older" list this year.  I [hope] to be better about living in the moment. Embrace feeling [really] confused sometimes. Embrace moments of clarity. Embrace the happy times as well as the sad.  Embrace my imperfections and faults, as well as embrace my talents. I also want to live life as I please without fear of judgement. Now, I'm not going to go out and be wild & reckless, but more this: I'm going to be better about speaking up when I feel strongly about something, asking for what want (without fear of rejection), take a "#selfie" if I damn well please, cry if I need to, laugh when I want to, and just let things come as they will. 

I'm feeling good about this year. It's going to be a good one.

Here's to seizing the moment. Happy Birthday to me!

hello there, its been a while...

just incase you were worried - i'm still alive!

it's been quite some time since i've posted. i miss it around here, i swear i do!  so much has happened in the past few months. so many good things.

last year i made a commitment to myself to work on things that i've struggled with all my life.  i found a great therapist who i adore and i thank her for helping me grow into the person i am today.  but not only do i thank her, i thank taylor and my family for their support, but most importantly i thank myself. a huge pat on the back to me for working my butt of to have all that i have today.  having genuine pride in yourself is a beautiful feeling.

everything is coming together and its exhilarating. everyday brings something new and exciting.  in the past few months i went from being very unhappy at my work, to absolutely loving it. and not just by luck. i learned how to be assertive, take charge and find my voice.  not too long ago i was ready to move on to something new. i won't get into to much detail but i know that no matter my decision i would have ended up just fine. but i decided to take a leap of faith at work and speak up. since then i've been promoted, got a healthy raise, traveled to toronto for a photo shoot, met some famous photographers, traveled to new york with my boss for a week.... i'm so very happy with where i am at in my career and it is such a freeing feeling coming from someone who was so doubtful about the future for quite some time. everyday is a challenge, but i love the people i work with and i wake up in the morning excited for a new day.

my personal life is moving along just fine too.  i've found a new love - pilates - and joined a studio up the street from my house (i'm obsessed). it seems taylor and i get closer and closer everyday. just when i think there is no way for us to get closer, something happens that brings us together. i feel i can talk to him about anything - and it took me a long while to get to this point. we talk about things that are new and uncomfortable, but its a safe place and i love him for that.

all in all, life is great and i can't wait to see what 2013 has to offer. i'm still thinking about what my new years resolutions goals will be- i already have a few. one being to visit these parts more often.

xo,
chelsea

here are some bits and pieces of my life in the past 3 months...

official resolution list

for 2012...

be creative: take my camera everywhere! continue to be open-minded to breaking rules and thinking outside of the box.

be more economical: save money and pay off car, start putting money away each month towards a house, and think twice about buying things i think i "need".

be smart: read all the books that i've started and haven't finished (life of pi, breakfast at tiffany's, water for elephants, the help).

be in-love: love myself as much as i love others and treat myself as i do others.

be more decisive: be more confident in my choices and seek less approval. i'm bound to make mistakes, but better my mistakes than someone else's.

be active: do yoga at least 3 times a week and walk whenever possible instead of driving.

be a visitor: continue traveling and go to places i've been longing to visit - vancouver, japan, paris, london...

be beautiful: more heels, less sandals; more dresses, skirts and pants, less jeans. keep my nails polished, my hair done and keep skin perfumed and moisturized. when i feel pretty, life seems a little easier.

be rough: find more comfort in the uncomfortable (mind, body and soul)